Zen Rollerball!!!


General Outline:

Two teams of two or three drivers each battle it out in the Zen Rollerball arena for fame and glory, with their first goal being to reach a pre-determined team points threshold. Once a team reaches the points threshold, that team may then try to end the match at any time by destroying a stationary objective vehicle, manned by the Host. The contest ends upon destruction of the objective vehicle, at which point the Host aborts mission and adjusts/calculates final scores. The highest total adjusted team score wins the match and the right to call themselves "Zen Warriors."


Suggested Scoring Rules:

Points Threshold: 5,000 points. More for longer games, less for shorter. If all cars are identical (ala IROC), kills will be worth 1,000 points apiece, thus a team will have to execute 5 kills before being allowed to go for the end-game objective.

End-Game Objective: A light- to moderately-armored car is recommended, since getting TO the end-game objective is really the challenge here. On the other hand, you don't want the Host car to get taken out too easily, especially not accidentally - if this happens, it is considered a MAJOR taboo and the team commiting the offense loses, immediately. A fightin' Lep' is a good choice.

Points Adjustments/Deductions: When the Host receives the scoring data from the server by aborting mission, he or she should jot it down immediately, and then create/host a new "post-game" ("Zen-R RESULTS!" etc.). Scores DO NOT need to be reduced by 400 points for every death (to discourage CTRL-ALT-X for quick and easy regens, etc.)! Because of game crashes/ISP dumps coupled with the fact that I-'76 does factor in some calculated score reduction for various forms of death, this kind of reduction was deemed impractical and unneccesary. More important is that the Host should be in SCORE mode (not CHAT mode), montitoring team scores continuously when competitors are going for the end-game kill. The kill happens FAST, and you will need to hit the spacebar before you can do ANYTHING - even get out of the game. So, Hosts, pay attention to who's comin' at you, and what the scores are THE MOMENT YOU HAVE DIED.

Miscellaneous: See also Appendix A: Zen Rollerball Etiquette, for thoughts regarding game crashes, no-shows, etc.


Sample Game Progression:

First, the Host should set up the game environment, using the following guidelines:

Select a good jumping car with SOME armor (you're gonna need to jump to the upper regen hut, and you may take a few incidental hits throughout the game). See Appendix B: Suggested Game Vehicles for a list of suggested game vehicles. It is also recommended that the Host modify his or her handle appropriately (e.g. "Ax-L - HOST!").

It is suggested that the Host initially set up a game entitled something like "Zen-R WarmUp," to allow players to gather, test and check vehicles; check PING times; run a few warmup laps; confirm team colors and scoring rules; ask any last-minute questions, etc. After everything is squared away in the warmup game, the Host should announce a "two-minute warning," then leave and start a new game for actual match play (this will also reset scores and blown-out objects like bridges). This game's title should somehow convey that it is an active Zen Rollerball match (e.g. "Zen-R 3-on-3," "Zen-R DIV.15.AVA," "Zen-R Hax/NoHax," etc.). The Host should not allow ANY players into the match game until the two-minute countdown has expired, and he or she is in position, engine off, inside the upper regen. The match officially begins the moment the first competitor is allowed into the arena!

The match game should be set up for INVITE-ONLY, TEAM PLAY, NO MAX SCORE, with only the appropriate number of player slots (e.g. 5 slots for a 2-on-2 match, for 4 competitors and 1 Host). It is suggested that the Host join as the "Yellow Jackets," the Home/Defending team as a "bright" color (Aqua Marines works) and the Visiting/Challenging team as a "dark" color (maybe the Puce Panthers) - these colors are easy to differentiate between during intense moments of multi-melee.

Once the match has started, the two teams battle to become the first to reach the agreed-upon team points threshold. Once a team has reached the threshold, then its members are eligible to take out the end-game objective (i.e. destroy the Host car). Once the end-game objective has been taken, the Host will IMMEDIATELY note the score, regen, quit and host the post-game. REMEMBER: Your team may reach the threshold FIRST, but still lose because of poor timing in taking out the Host car (do it BEFORE reaching the threshold and it's like sinking the 8-ball too early in pool - you lose; too late and the other team may "steal" your victory by subsequently racking up a bunch of kills and waiting for ANYBODY to end the game).
 
Appendix A: Zen Rollerball Etiqutte

Zen Rollerball is all about proving who the most BADASS Interstate '76 drivers are - individuals AND teams. Part of being an I-'76 Badass is being a responsible, courteous ass-kicker.

First, it is suggested that you don't bother with "alternates" in tourney planning, etc. The best vigilantes ALWAYS make their fights and stand by their partners. If a driver misses a scheduled match, their team should suffer the consequences and play short. A complete team no-show should simply be considered a loss. A Host no-show should be ridiculed throughout I-'76 discussion boards WWW-wide.

Second, don't fart around during the game setup time. Interstate '76 chat is inconvenient enough as it is, so you don't need to go making things even more confusing by goofing off during the setup period.

Third, don't bring the rest of the game down if you're experiencing/causing technical difficulties. The host should be the only participant who MIGHT need to run a program like Chainsaw's "Hacker Tracker," etc. It is suggested to mimimize ALL background activities and maximize connection quality, to enhance game play for all (see Appendix C: Maximizing Playability for various suggestions).

A few more specifics:

Game Crashes: If a competitor's game crashes during a match for some reason, gameplay should continue and the player should try to get back into the match as quickly as possible - don't leave your teammate out there all alone! Game crashes are minimal among non-hacked players who know how to configure their systems, so this should be treated just like a car breaking down in the field - get it runnin' again ASAP!!! On the other hand, if the Host's game crashes, the game should be declared a "mis-match" and started over, perhaps with a different Host. (Editor's note: At this time, there is a pending suggestion to implement a 2-minute timeout the moment any player exits the game. After 2 minutes, play would continue, regardless of the missing player's return. This has not been tested yet, but sounds reasonable.) 

Hosts: NEVER start/move your car. Maintain control of your games. Keep things moving. Take pictures. Keep an eye on ALL competitors. Be fair and use common sense - the strangest things can happen during Interstate '76 multi-melees and you may be called upon to make a command decision at any time. Also, keep a pen/pencil and paper handy - you need to ABORT MISSION IMMEDIATELY upon having your car (the end-game objective) taken out and jot down ALL the competitors statistics - this is perhaps your toughest, most important responsibility (besides getting your ass parked in the upper regen in the first place, hehehehe). REMEMBER: You are going to have to hit the spacebar before you can do ANYTHING else, like exit the game. So, before you get nailed, make sure you've got the score turned on in front of you and you're prepared for the end....

Competitors: You should generally remain silent except during actual match play, or if you have necessary questions for the host. Also, come to the match prepared - in the appropriate car, ready to go, on the right team. Respect the Host. Host decisions are FINAL (if you're really concerned about Host neutrality then use two Hosts - one representing each camp, and the end-game objective can be either or both Host cars, just be clear about it up front).


Appendix B: Suggested Game Vehicles

Under construction....


Appendix C: Maximizing Playability

Schedule matches in which the Host and competitors are all using roughly equal-speed Internet connections.

Don't bother with multiple Hosts or spectators if at all possible - this will just increase the networking demands of the game, thereby increasing the effect of "net lag."

Consider "banning" certain weapons - mines layed by the dozen, as well as any other object dropped en masse that hangs around for a while, cause noticeable increase in lag (e.g. several competitors simultaneously using firedrop, etc.). 

The Host and competitors should all check their PING times to the chosen server during the warmup game. Allow those with crappy PING times to re-dial their ISP, etc. in an attempt to improve their connections. Also, if all involved are savvy enough, try a "privately hosted" game - use one of the players' ISPs as the server, instead of the Activision servers.

Don't use hacks. Not because they're "unfair," but because many of them seem to be extremely "skippy," and they often cause frustrating game crashes.

Kill ALL unnecessary background processes on your PC. For example, set your display to 640 x 480 x 256, and disable any screen savers. Use CTRL-ALT-DEL to bring up the Close Program dialog box to allow you to kill things like anti-viruses, system agents, quick resolution-switchers, CD players, zip drive drivers (IOWATCH), etc. After doing all this, reboot completely and re-kill any tasks that re-start automatically. Seems anal, but this voodoo also seems to noticeably smooth things out and minimize game crashes.

Create a new dialup connection specifically for gaming - disable ALL error correction and data compression.

Try the following game audio/graphics settings: Music off, visibility range at far or medium, clouds off, terrain textures on, terrain resolution low, terrain detail high, object detail high, shadow detail low, rear mirror off, and THEN adjust screen resolution to the most acceptable level.

Play on a LAN!

Get a faster PC, modem and ISP connection!

Tell Activision to hurry up with the D3D patch!


Appendix D: Something Fun (A Little Sleazy Literature w/o Begin or End....)

"Zen & Cherries"

* * *

Thump-thump-thump coupled with that sickening metallic cracking sound, three more slugs from Podaar's turreted 30mm cannon tore into the passenger side of Cherry's beloved Poptart Racer. "Damn! I just re-painted that door last week," she muttered to herself. "What the hell am I doin' here anyways?" Wasn't any prize money to be had, that's for sure, and not even salvage for cryin' out loud! Thump! Another one, this time sounded like it took out the driver's headlight, maybe even ripped up the fender a bit. "Shit! Pay attention, Cherry, you're gonna lose a tire fast you keep this up...."

That's when she heard it - the voice: "Use the TORQUE, Cherry, use the TORQUE." Shit. Be real. Somethin' like this could ONLY happen in the Zen Rollerball arena. What a fuckin' CRAZY place to begin with! I mean, really - a regen bunker nestled in a deadly SPIKED pit? A multi-tiered single-loop Yin-Yang "speedway?" And why does everybody have that funky look on their face when they tell me I need to go WAY FASTER off those jumps if I wanna keep my ass alive?

The jolt of Stingray's sneak-attack ram from behind was enough to jar Cherry back into action. Without thinking, she slap-shifted the Z-gate on her custom Cherry Cavera Poptart Racer into reverse, and punched it HARD! Even though the throaty growl of her blown 432 made her a bit warm and fuzzy between her legs, she managed to keep her focus and back her ass out of there nearly perpendicular to her foes. As she hit the brakes and cut the engine, she nudged the wheel just a tad to the left, bringing the driver's door of Podaar's sleek, but battleworn Phaedra Rattler right into her sights.

Click. She switched from 7.62mm turret-fire to firerites. "Bastard!" she shouted, probably loud enough for him to hear, if it weren't for the sudden "FWHOOOSSHHH!!!" of rocket-fire followed by the satisfying rumble of a direct hit on his car. She was able to nail him with one more round and bring him down from yellow to red before he re-started his engine and turned tail, making a bee-line for the jump to the regen pit.

At this point, Cherry snuck a quick look out her window to see what Stingray was up to. Ha! His Lep' was sittin' in BAD shape, directly off to her left. The right rear fender was about to fall off and his 7.62mm turret hung loosely from it's mount on the roof. He was still trying to re-start his engine, which had stalled as a result of the Kamikaze tactics - not a good position to be in when you've just pissed off a gal like Cherry. Nope, Cherry was all BITCH when she needed to be, and that included packin' a lightweight, but modern Glock 20 instead of that unreliable cold-steel Colt .45 the boys all liked to carry.

Stingray knew what was comin' the minute he saw the gleam in her eye and Cherry's cold smirk as she leveled her handcannon directly at his head. "Hack BITCH!!!" she heard him scream, as he continued trying frantically to get his engine started. Cherry listened with satisfaction for a second to the bolts-in-a-blender sound comin' from the Lep' before ending the scene by pulling the trigger a half-dozen times, providing Stingray with some new custom lead dental work. "HOOONNNNNNKKKKKKKKK!!!" She heard his horn fading in the background as she powered out of there, her thoughts returning to the ridiculousness of her present situation.

Glory. One word, that was it - glory. THAT'S what Zen Rollerball was all about and why she had let herself get drawn into a two-on-one match against Podaar and Stingray, here in this psychotic arena. And they were playing for keeps, this time, too - pink slips. If she won, Podaar would never again be seen drivin' the obnoxious little Rattler - it would be hers to dispose of, as she pleased, nothing more than the scrap metal it really was. But, if THEY won.... She didn't even want to think about that. The thought of living, let alone racing, without her little Cherry Cavera was almost unbearable, and nearly brought a tear to her eye - nearly.

"I wish Ax-L was here," she thought to herself. Ax-L was Cherry's beau, a big stud-puppy of a guy who called the barren and dangerous Badlands his home. He and Cherry had a beautiful fort nestled up there in the hills, with plenty of open space to teach the kids the ropes of autodueling in their cute little AMX Striders. Funny. Never thought she'd end up with an AMX kind of guy like Ax, but he had shown her without a doubt that he knew how to make a Lep' roar like the King of the Beasts (which was her pet name for him that he really didn't like getting around ... hehehehe....).

But, Ax-L WASN'T here, so she was on her own this time. Big talk, always gettin' her in trouble, as usual. She had tried to sweet-talk her way out of the duel by e-mailing Podaar some tantalizing and titillating pix of herself the night before, but unfortunately she had given him one that also had that slut Lola Paluzza in it - and now he seemed more interested in getting Lola's phone number than anything else (besides the pink slip to the Cherry Cavera).

Cherry checked the score and the general condition of her sled as she cruised the arena in search of Podaar. There was no WAY he could've made that jump red as he was, yet she hadn't heard any report of him trashing the vehicle, either - he had to be nearby somewhere. Hot damn! The Poptart was only moderately damaged, and she was just under the 5K point threshold they had agreed upon - if she could hunt down and finish that punk Podaar, she'd be eligible for the end-game objective run and could get her ass OUTTA THIS PLACE!

Slowly, circling like a shark lookin' for the meal she can smell but can't see, Cherry cruised the lower tier looking for the Rattler. Podaar was pulling his usual shit, hiding out with his engine off, just waiting for an opportunity to lock that 30mm cannon into, er, onto Cherry's tailpipe. "Not THIS time, sucker," she said with a smile as she spotted the telltale puffs of smoke floating out from a small alcove ahead and to the right. She tapped the gas for a little extra momentum, killed the engine and coasted on in....

The plan was to glide in, blast a couple rounds of firerites in his face, ram him head-on, and finish up, if necessary, with a little 7.62mm slice 'n' dice. Plans never work. Podaar had chosen his alcove well - there was barely room enough to conceal his Rattler, let alone to do the tango Cherry had in mind. What's more, he had obviously been following her via his remote monitor, and was ready as sin to dead-fire his 30mm cannon as soon as she rolled in.

Thump-thump-thump! There it was again, that AWFUL sound. Cherry turned the ignition with one hand and went for reverse with the other as she tried to get out of the way. Her front armor was gone now, and she was about to lose her front left tire. She remembered her firerites were still armed, and in a desperation move fired off a volley or two into the smokey mess in front of her as she burned rubber in reverse. KABOOM!!! Rattler pieces went flying everywhere, and she could swear she had heard someone yelling, "WHORE!!! BITCH, DIE!!!" just as she vaporized the offending vehicle.

That was it! The score monitor read 5,450 points for Cherry, and 4,650 for her opponents. Feeling victory near at hand, Cherry pulled a quick Rockford and started the sprint to the end-game objective. All she had to do was make that crazy-ass jump from the main plateau to the objective bunker residing on that TINY little island of a mesa surround by ... NOTHING ... and take out the driverless Strider awaiting here there. Yeah, that's all, right!.

BEEP-BEEP! Shit. Before she could get focused on her final approach to the jump, Cherry's radar picked up Stingray, who had been quietly watching his partner get polished off, as he waited patiently in the wings for a greater kill - her! Now he opened up his fresh 7.62mm turret on her battle-weary 'Tart as she climbed the hill to the plateau, and before she could cry, "CHERRYPICKIN' ASSHOLE!!!" he neatly cut right through her non-existent front armor and took out her left front tire, then the right, then the rest of her suspension....

"***Cherry Poptart was killed by Stingray," read the score monitor. She never even made it to the plateau. And the score was now 5,700 to her 5,450 - enough to qualify BOTH sides for the end-game objective!

* * *


Appendix E: Credits

Ax-L

Stingray ms/ava

Podaar

GoM StrikeAce

GoM Ozone AVA

The rest of the Beta Team, to numerous to mention because the list seemed to grow rather quickly.... ;-)

